Funny enough… Animals are quite noisy!

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Previously I have posted about my struggles with depersonalization disorder… The relief of being diagnosed and validated and also the joy of learning new skills which have helped me enormously. I do t know about you- but sometimes I only realise that something has ‘gone’ when it comes back again!!! Like when you get a headache and then you realise you actually haven’t had a headache for a while. Well this past two weeks has been a bit of a throw back to so elf those depersonalization symptoms.

I’ve noticed the zoning out… That awful sense of unreality – am I really here… Is this really happening… That feeling of life being under a glass bell jar and every time I try and touch it I can’t get beyond the glass jar… I’d forgotten just how horrible that is…

But thankfully this time- I can see what is happening and most probably the reasons for it… And I can help myself come through this episode. Mindfulness exercises, especially bodily awareness and awareness of my environment through the senses. That’s just reminded me I need to put an elastic band on my wrist and use that to bring myself back. I am having to work very hard to stay in my body… But it will eventually ease.

Crafting as always has really helped lift my mood today and keep me focused. I have been loving doing the long point but I’ve nearly finished so with my friend we purchased a needle felting kit and I’ve had a wonderful time creating this beautiful brooch.

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My friends live in a rural area, next door to a farm. They also own a field where the farmer puts his sheep in to graze. As I’ve been trying so hard to focus on reality by tuning into my senses- I’ve noticed how noisy they are! Especially at the crack of dawn!

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The cockerel is also very loud as are the numerous birds in the trees! It’s been lovely to focus on some of these sounds. There are worse things I can be focussing on!

Thanks for listening.

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