It’s been a bit of a emotional roller coaster this week… all good… but challenging. I am now feeling slightly beyond myself with tiredness, but all good.
Friday evening my friend gave a message to Ronnie. He said he will contact me via Facebook. Saturday my friend texts to say he had spoken to her and told her he’d messaged me but I hadn’t responded. I pressed every button on Facebook and I couldn’t see a message.
I worked so hard at remaining dialectical and did a really good job of it 🙂 He could have told an untruth to her to get us of his back or he could have sent it to another Hepzibah, I could have just not looked in the right pleas etc… Rejection did try and rear it’s head but I have to say I managed it really well. The worst thought was that he had messaged me and once again I hadn’t responded- I didn’t like that thought so I decided to by hook or by crook get hold of him.
Wednesday evening, a friend helped me and we discovered that he had in fact messaged me on the original Friday night- I had not known there was an other message bit in FB. Unfortunately now I may have come across as a bit of a stalker as I managed to track down a violinist who had given his number to the band conductor (all the time he had just messaged me…. annoying or what!!!!)
I messaged back and made it a bit clearer who I was. I have not heard from him since 😦 I have been fine, I decided to wait until I saw Penelope. We agreed I would send one more message apologising for what I did 25 years ago. He may have many reasons for not wanting to reply or quite possibly and more likely he may not even remember me and is too embarrassed to say that.
It’s one of those situations where you do wonder what on earth was all that about…,It has been about so much more than meeting him again. It has been amazing. I am really thankful for all the opportunities I have to learn, grow and challenge myself.
My plans continue regardless. This week is big… I go to the hair academy on Tuesday and the cosmetic/ make up consultation on Friday. My palms sweat a bit when I even write that, but I will do it.
thanks for listening.