Burlesque

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I had planned to write this before the events of last week, so in the light of my previous post- here goes!

I have been to 3 burlesque dance sessions and it is great. It is going to be so helpful for me! 🙂

The ladies only class is full of ages, shapes, sizes and abilities. It is Sooo challenging- I love it!!!

Most of the ladies get dressed up for the classes. There is copious amounts of bare flesh showing and I am having to be utterly non- judgemental and one mindful to manage my inner repulsion at women’s flesh. I am doing well.

I have not got dressed up! In fact, I actually wore pyjama bottoms for the first two sessions! As I said to my friend, if I wore a nun’s habit I couldn’t be more covered up! Last week I moved from baggy pj bottoms to proper leggings with a long shirt covering my backside!

The exercise part of it is perfect for my struggles with depersonalization. I have blogged before about my trouble to connect with my body. I know I have a hand, but I can’t relate to the fact that it is my hand… I know that sounds strange- but it is quite a horrible feeling. The movements in burlesque are quite minimal at times and I have been connected with my wrists and elbows in a whole new way! I do the choreography mindfully and I am slowly becoming acquainted with my body in new ways- which is so exciting.

My psychiatrist thinks this is one of the best things I’ve ever done. He was go smacked when I told him! Penelope doesn’t know I’ve signed up- she will be surprised as well.

I have a very long way to go. I am no where near wearing other clothes but I have gone with the props. I am now the proud owner of pink satin gloves and a pink feather fan- I love them!!!!

Last week I spent a few days with my dearest friend Miranda, we went shopping. Miranda has been with me in most of my sublime to ridiculous adventures- but she did almost draw the line in coming into Ann Summers with me !!!!!! ( I didn’t want to either but apparently they do good fans!) it felt really special looking for pink gloves with her 🙂 even more special when at one point we we talking about steamer saucepans and pink gloves at the same time- oh how my life has changed!!!

Who knows where my burlesque journey will take me… Doesn’t really matter where… My plan is to go through the journey one-mindfully, trying to participate as much as I can and managing my distress at difficult situations. It’s good fun.

Thanks for listening

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